Co-regulation is a concept that holds a vital place in both therapy and healing. Rooted in the idea that our nervous systems influence one another, it suggests that when one person is calm and grounded, they can help another achieve a similar state. This dynamic is not only essential in human interactions but is also observed widely in the natural world, particularly among animals.
Understanding Co-Regulation
Co-regulation is the process by which one person's emotional and physiological state helps to regulate another's. This is evident in the way a child looks to a parent after a fall; the parent's calmness can reassure the child, reducing their distress. As adults, we continue to seek this co-regulation, often turning to friends or loved ones when we are upset. The comforting presence of someone we trust can help us regain our emotional balance.
However, co-regulation can also work negatively. If someone becomes anxious or frightened, those around them may quickly mirror that state, leading to collective dysregulation. This can happen in our daily lives, such as when a partner comes home agitated, and we find ourselves embroiled in an argument without understanding why.
In a therapeutic context, co-regulation is intentionally used to create a safe and supportive environment. According to polyvagal theory, developed by Dr Stephen Porges, our nervous systems are wired to seek out and respond to signals of safety from others. When a therapist’s nervous system is in the "ventral vagal" state, which is associated with feelings of safety and social connection, they are better able to connect with the client. This connection helps the client’s nervous system to co-regulate, reducing feelings of anxiety or threat and allowing for more effective therapeutic work.
This concept is especially relevant in various healing practices including energy healing, where the healer’s balanced energy can help the client’s system to align and heal.
The Seed Crystal Concept in Energetic Work
In energy healing, the idea of influencing others through your own state of being can be likened metaphorically to a seed crystal. Just as a seed crystal initiates crystallisation, your vibrational frequency can catalyse change in those around you. By cultivating a state filled with light and balance, your energy radiates outward, subtly encouraging others to align with this higher frequency. This can facilitate healing and transformation in those whose energy fields you touch, as they begin to replicate your balanced energy. In the words of one of my favourite spiritual teachers White Bull:
Think of a seed crystal and the perfect order of its molecular structure. If you immerse that seed crystal in a crystalline liquid it will grow not into any haphazard shape but into a larger version of that original perfect form. Just as the liquid is latent crystal so all human consciousness is latent enlightenment.
Of course, the oppositite is also true. Our aggressive energy or negtive beliefs and expectations can affect others and even be acted out by them. Because the world dances to our tune, it is always within our gift to choose what melody to play. This is why it is also important to make use of any help that is available, and when you don't have access to a therapist or a healer, then there are many self-regulation tools that can help.
In the light of the seed crystal metaphor, I suggest expanding the concept of co-regulation to encompass not just the interplay of our nervous systems, but also the dynamics between the electromagnetic fields of our hearts, a connection that has been explored by other researchers and practitioners (including Dr. Stephen Porges, Dr. Rollin McCraty, and Deb Dana). Research from the HeartMath Institute has shown that our hearts generate electromagnetic fields that extend beyond our bodies, influencing those around us. When we achieve a state of heart coherence - where our heart rhythms are balanced and harmonious - this state can positively impact others, much like tuning a musical instrument to a pure note that guides the rest of the orchestra. By maintaining heart coherence, we can subtly encourage those we interact with to align vibrationally with our balanced state. Whether we are therapists, healers, or simply moving through our daily lives, cultivating heart coherence is a powerful practice that enhances our ability to positively influence the emotional and energetic environments we share with others.
Conclusion
In a future blog, I’ll dive deeper into the concept of self-regulation, exploring practical ways to cultivate heart coherence and maintain a ventral vagal state. For now, I hope this post has highlighted the power of these concepts and the fascinating research behind them. If you're interested in exploring these ideas further or seeing how they might benefit you personally, I invite you to book a free consultation with me.
Further Reading
Porges, Stephen W. (2011). The Polyvagal Theory: Neurophysiological Foundations of Emotions, Attachment, Communication, and Self-Regulation. W.W. Norton & Company.
Explores how the autonomic nervous system affects emotional regulation and social behaviour.
Dana, Deb. (2018). The Polyvagal Theory in Therapy: Engaging the Rhythm of Regulation. Norton & Company.
Offers practical applications of polyvagal theory to enhance therapeutic practices.
Graham, Ian (2000). God is Never Late... but Never Early Either! Tagman Press.
Explores the spiritual insights and teachings of White Bull.
McCraty, R., Atkinson, M., Tomasino, D., & Bradley, R. T. (2009). "The Coherent Heart: Heart–Brain Interactions, Psychophysiological Coherence, and the Emergence of System-Wide Order." Integral Review, 5(2), 10-115.
This paper explores the interaction between the heart and brain, emphasizing how achieving heart coherence can create a state of system-wide physiological order, which can positively influence both the individual and others through the heart's electromagnetic field.
Commentaires